Today’s dating scene is not for the faint of heart. There’s stiff competition out there, and the last thing you want is to make the wrong move and scare off the ladies! Want to know how to make a girl want you? We’ve got everything you need.
Let’s get one thing straight, though: we’re not talking about one night stands. That’s an entirely different skill set and yields temporary results.
We’re talking about something a little more long-term: a real, fulfilling, and healthy relationship with the woman of your dreams. You want her in your life, and our guidelines can make that happen.
Thing is, getting a girl’s attention can be a real challenge. You’ve got a lot of men vying for her time, and you want to stand out in the best way.
The goal here isn’t just to get a millisecond of her notice. You want her to think about you constantly. Whether she’s at work, at school, at the gym, or wherever — you want to fill her brain with thoughts of you.
Her friends are bored because she talks about you constantly over brunch — and they’ve never even met you.
That’s a tall order, we know, but it’s not impossible. We know how to make a girl want you, and we’re ready to teach you how.
Show confidence in your body language.
A great first impression is key to getting a girl’s attention. You want her to notice you right off the bad, and for all the right reasons.
Your body language speaks volumes and you can make her sit up and pay attention without even having to say anything. The most important vibe to give off? Confidence.
When you are confident, you are attractive. Square your shoulders, maintain eye contact, and move with purpose. You want to look self-assure and comfortable.
Avoid hunching your shoulders — the last thing you want is to look defeated before a conversation even starts. When you do talk, remember to speak in a strong and steady voice. It makes you sound more confident and outgoing, rather than nervous and awkward.
Be attentive when you’re together.
There are so many distractions these days that paying attention has become a real skill. We’ve become so accustomed to handling the overload of information all the time that we’re not used to giving 100% focus anymore.
Set yourself apart from the pack by giving her undivided attention when you’re together. Ignore your phone, ignore anyone else, and just focus on her.
The most important factor here is to be sincere. Keeping your eyes on her while your brain wanders off? That’s not gonna work at all.
Instead, you want to really listen to what she’s sharing with you. Ask her questions and share your own anecdotes. We’re talking about a real, honest to goodness conversation that strengthens your connection.
Make sure you look good.
It’s a real tragedy that some men equate manliness with not caring about their looks at all. Taking care of yourself doesn’t make you less of a man!
Relationships are built on more than just physical attraction, true. Still, you can’t honestly ask a woman to overlook poor hygiene and fall in love with your winning personality. That’s a really tall order and a pretty unreasonable demand.
Looking good doesn’t mean you have to be movie star handsome. Just practicing basic hygiene can go a long way. Shower, shave, and get a regular haircut so you don’t look slovenly. Wear clothes that fit your build and your attractiveness level shoots up several points right away.
You don’t have to look like Thor to be considered fit, either. All you need is regular exercise to maintain a healthy figure. It’s also a good way to let the ladies know that you care about your health and you’re not just a slob who eats chips and sits on the couch all day. Nobody wants that.
Be supportive and reliable.
If you want her to want you, you need to make her remember you. One good way to do so is to stand out as a reliable person she can count on in times of trouble.
Even the strongest and most independent of women will need some help sometimes. Advertise your skills, make yourself available, and show her that she can rely on you when the going gets tough.
It’s not just about helping her with car maintenance or home repair, either. Emotional availability is even more valuable, and can definitely endear you to her.
Be her safe space. Listen to her, let her rant, and give her the emotional support that she needs.
Don’t be pushy.
The golden rule of dating: respect her boundaries. If a woman shows no interest in you, walk away and move on. Being pushy and forceful isn’t manly — it’s annoying at best and creepy at worst.
Trust us: women don’t like it when you take up their personal space and touch them without permission, especially if they’ve already indicated that your presence is not welcome. Forcing the issue won’t change her mind. You’re just turning her off even more.
It’s also important to take things slow if that’s what she prefers. Even if a girl shows interest in you, make sure you pay attention to her wishes and let her dictate the pace of intimacy.
Compliment her sincerely.
Here’s the thing: compliments are good. However, it’s very important to use compliments wisely, otherwise it can backfire on you.
Make sure you are sincere when you praise her. If you compliment her on every single thing, you sound fake and your words end up sounding hollow. The last thing you want is to sound like an obsessive fan.
Don’t just focus on the physical, either. It can get annoying fast if all you can seem to see in her are the superficial things. Complimenting her hair is great, but anything too focused on the body is bordering on creepy.
The most important tip for giving great compliments: reinforce the things she loves about herself. Is she into weight-lifting? Admire her gym gains and ask about her workout routine. In love with a knitter? Compliment that scarf she made herself.
Stay in touch through technology.
You don’t want to be the person who texts non-stop, because people are busy and no one wants to be tied to their phone all day. The key here is in maintaining that connection without scaring her off with 10 missed calls per day.
Greeting her every morning is a good first step. You’re building a routine here: start off with a short and sweet morning message to make her smile. Don’t badger her, though! A text or two to wish her a good day ahead is more than enough when you’re still testing the waters.
Stop pushing it if she’s less than responsive. Curt responses or outright ignoring your texts? It’s a lost cause so give up.
If she’s pretty receptive, though, that’s when you take it to the next step! Text her about matters relevant to your shared experiences, memories, and inside jokes to build a stronger and more intimate connection.
Be fun, be flirty, and be a lighthearted conversationalist.
Make her laugh.
Humor is a very powerful too to forge human connection. If you can make her laugh, you’ve definitely got one foot in the door.
Self-deprecating humor can be a great option, especially when you’re just getting to know each other. It lets her know that you don’t take yourself too seriously and that you’re willing to laugh at yourself.
That said, be careful not to put yourself down too much! It can be really cringe-inducing, and you’ll go from funny guy to sad loser in a heartbeat.
Prove that you are stable and can take care of her.
What do women want? Simple: women want a partner in life. True, most romantic comedies focus too much on the grand gestures and the crazy shenanigans. Those movies aren’t really reflective of what real life women want and need.
For women, a healthy relationship requires a partner they can trust. They don’t want someone who will sweep them off their feet! Women want a man who’ll make sure they’re standing on stable ground.
Women find stability very attractive, though it’s not the sort of thing that makes for Hollywood blockbusters. They want a capable partner — physically, emotionally, and financially.
Just to clarify, women don’t want men who walk around flaunting their bank accounts. They’re not looking for wealth, per se. What they want is a man who’s financially independent — someone who can be a trustworthy partner on equal footing and not a financial burden.
Show hints that you’re romantically interested.
In case you haven’t noticed, women aren’t mind readers. They can’t tell that you’re into them if you don’t let them know.
But what if you’re not ready to confess your feelings just yet? That’s fine. You don’t have to rush it, and you’re probably better off taking things slow anyway.
Still, you don’t want to box yourself in! Unless you show some non-platonic interest, a woman is bound to assume that you just want to be friends and want nothing more. They’ll cross you off as a potential romantic partner, and getting out of that zone can be a challenge.
So how do you show romantic interest without getting too serious? Flirting is the best tool for the job. Gentle teasing and light banter can help build rapport and hint at something more than just friendship. When done well, flirting can build intimacy and bring you closer.
Of course, being upfront is always an option, even if you’re trying to stay casual. Ask her out on a coffee date or something similarly low-key to get started.
Don’t play mind games.
Some men think women will be more interested if they seem unattainable. They blow hot and cold on the texts, messaging her non-stop one day only to ignore her replies the next.
Men want to play it cool, and that’s perfectly fine. The problem is when they start sending mixed signals just so they don’t look like they’re too invested in a woman. It’s a rookie mistake, and tells the woman that you’re immature and not ready for a real connection.
You can’t be running a player’s mindset if you want a healthy and happy romantic relationship. Mind games only work on people with low self-esteem or toxic personalities. Smart women can spot that drama a mile away and they’ll be running away from you in a heartbeat.
It is absolutely possible to be cool and casual while still being genuine.
Make sure every shared experience is memorable.
You want to be front and center of all her best memories, and there’s only one way to achieve that: create them with her.
Every opportunity to interact should be memorable, but there’s no need to go the expensive route. Try a new sport, or go to a restaurant you’ve both never been to. Adventurous experiences make for memorable moments.
It’s also a good idea to listen to her and find out what she’s interested in doing so you can join her. Is she looking to visit the new art exhibit at the local museum? Make it a date to remember.
Here’s a final reminder: the secret to a healthy and happy relationship with your dream girl? You need to see that women aren’t complicated; they have needs and desires just like you.
They want love, respect, and stability from their partner, and if you can prove yourself capable of these traits, they won’t be able to resist. The secret to female attention isn’t flashy arrogance or muscular abs — it’s a lot simpler and much more realistic.
Sure, women can appreciate romantic gestures, but this happens after they’ve already identified you as someone they want to be part of their life. Grand, dramatic gestures are devoid of meaning if a woman can’t see you as a life partner.
Be the man she can trust and rely on, and you’ve got her full and undivided attention.