12 Ways To Tell There’s Chemistry Between Two People
When it comes to romantic connections, sometimes you just know. But the spark isn’t always immediately obvious, especially when you’ve just started getting to know each other. Don’t worry — these twelve subtle signs will help you figure out if there is chemistry between two people.
First up — chemistry isn’t the most romantic word out there. Not unless you’re the sort of person who’s really into the periodic table of elements.
But “romantic” chemistry doesn’t involve lab gowns and test tubes. It’s a more complicated matter that involves rapport, attraction, and compatibility.
The problem is that chemistry can be difficult to define, since people who experience it usually use very vague terms like “spark” or “vibe”. It’s not entirely rational and isn’t always a conscious experience.
When two people with chemistry come together, the neurotransmitters fire up the pleasure centers of the brain and trigger the hormones. Without chemistry, there is no attraction, and therefore no relationship.
Of course, some people may think chemistry is automatically equivalent to finding your soulmate, but that’s not necessarily true. Where the concept of a “soulmate” is more fantasy than anything, romantic chemistry relies on a number of real factors like a similarity in interests, mutual physical attraction, and compatibility.
Here are twelve useful clues to tell if there’s chemistry between two people.
There’s an immediate sense of familiarity.
You know how sometimes, you talk to a person you’ve just met and yet you feel like you’ve known each other forever? It’s a very comforting sense of familiarity that isn’t very common, especially when meeting new people.
The fact that it’s unique makes it all the more powerful as an indicator of chemistry. There isn’t a rational explanation for this sense of familiarity just yet, but it’s an emotional sign that two people have that connection.
They don’t share every interest, but they can bond despite the differences.
Chemistry isn’t about sharing all interests and having all the same preferences. That would be odd, and probably feel a little fake since having the exact same interests is very unlikely.
Instead, you know there’s a real connection when you can go beyond your similarities and have a healthy respect for your differences. You might not share the other’s interest in animated movies, but you are genuinely willing to learn more about it and listen to their passions.
They find it easy to open up and share.
This is completely tied to the sense of familiarity mentioned earlier. You find them comfortable to talk to, and find yourself opening up and sharing your thoughts easily.
With most people, our tendency is to clam up and share only what is necessary. This is because we’re trying to put our best foot forward and we can get nervous about how people perceive us.
When there’s chemistry, the nervousness melts away and you are able to share your thoughts and opinions much more freely. We’re not talking about your deepest, darkest secrets! It’s about feeling comfortable enough to talk and having an implicit trust in the other person.
They finish each other’s sentences.
You are pretty much on the same page all the time — there’s no need for any additional explanations as one already knows what the other is thinking. Sometimes, exchanging looks is enough to get information across.
This is an inexplicable connection that links two people. It usually comes from practiced familiarity, so it can be really unique and outstanding when it happens to two people who just met. It’s uncanny, and a testament to how powerful good chemistry can be.
They unconsciously mirror each other when together.
People often talk about body language, and for good reason. Our body says a lot without resorting to words, and there’s often information to unpack from just observing how a person moves and rests.
Mirroring — copying the other’s poses or actions while interacting — is a good indicator of attraction. When you’re with someone you’re attracted to, you unconsciously mirror their pose. It’s completely subconscious so you might not even notice yourself doing it.
They make each other laugh.
Humor is a tricky thing. The things you find funny don’t always translate well when you’re joking around with acquaintances. Finding someone who genuinely shares humor is a remarkable thing!
When you can make each other laugh, that’s a sure sign of chemistry. It increases a feeling of intimacy when you can laugh together. You know what makes it even better? The more time you spend together, the stronger the chemistry since you start building shared experiences and inside jokes.
They are comfortable in shared silence.
When it comes to social interaction, most people think silence is a bad thing. This is understandable; we want great conversations when we’re with other people. Silence can make us feel like we’ve failed.
But when there is chemistry between two people, silence is perfectly fine. You are comfortable together, even without exchanging any words.
You never have to second guess if the other is bored or unhappy, because you know that just being together is enough. You could just sit side by side doing your own thing and still have an enjoyable time.
Time flies when they’re together.
You can’t get enough of each other’s company because being together is simply so enjoyable. It’s not even about the activity you’re doing together. You don’t have to be at the club or out traveling to enjoy the time you share.
You know how some people say they spent all night talking, or that they find mundane things like grocery shopping exhilarating just because they’re doing it together? That right there is chemistry for you.
Play touching comes naturally.
Of course, you might think we’re talking about sexual attraction when we talk about touching. That’s an integral part of mutual attraction, definitely.
But romantic chemistry isn’t sexual right off the bat. Playful and innocent touches may seem like small gestures, but they certainly speak the loudest. Touching someone you’re still getting to know can be quite awkward, and is often avoided in social situations.
It’s an easy way for men and women to gauge how another person feels about them without directly saying anything.
If you are comfortable enough together that physical contact feels completely natural — congratulations: you guys have got chemistry in spades.
It’s not just a romantic connection — it’s also a friendship.
Physical attraction is one thing — chemistry goes beyond just finding the other person hot.
Chemistry is about rapport and a natural connection. It’s the sort of thing you can’t force or fake. When you have chemistry, you enjoy each other’s company — with or without the romance factor.
You have fun together, you enjoy each other’s company, and beyond a romantic relationship, you see each other as best friends as well.
Mutual attraction based on the physical is all well and good, but chemistry allows for a connection to go beyond that and build a potentially stronger relationship.
Excited to see each other all the time.
One sure sign of chemistry is when you’re excited to be together. You leave every interaction hoping for more, thinking about the next opportunity before you’ve even reached home.
It’s not just getting together, either. Everything you see reminds you of the other. The things you see remind you of shared experiences and inside jokes. You’re constantly thinking of things the other will like or enjoy.
This eagerness to share every moment is one sure sign of good chemistry between the two of you.
Romantic Chemistry Between Couples
Most of the signs mentioned above focus on chemistry between newly introduced people who might eventually go into a relationship, but what about those already in one?
The sad reality is that not all couples have good romantic chemistry. As mentioned, it’s not something you can force. Here are five signs that a couple has great chemistry.
They value physical contact.
A romantic relationship can lose its spark when the couple starts to forget certain essentials like physical contact. Apart from sex, a couple with good chemistry will know that physical touches are important to keep the fire alive.
Hugging, kissing, and sweet touches keep the love strong and the chemistry even stronger. Without that contact, the bond between the couple can slowly deteriorate and may dissolve over time.
The best couples are unafraid to show affection towards each other.
They know what makes the other happy.
You know how some couples just seem a lot more in tune? This is because couples with good chemistry take note of the small things.
They know what their partner likes and dislikes. They take note of these small things, remember the anecdotes their loved one shared, and make use of the information to keep the other happy.
It may seem like a small gesture, but a lot of couples fail because they don’t pay enough attention to details or remember the things their partner has shared in various conversations. Having chemistry means being in tune and actually taking note of your partner’s needs.
They show mutual respect.
Physical attraction and lust — these things play a role in a healthy romantic relationship. What gives a couple real chemistry — and a much stronger connection — is mutual respect.
They see each other as individuals and partners, and there is a healthy acknowledgement of the other’s needs and wants. Without respect, this relationship won’t last. Chemistry is built on respect, love, and trust.
They try to stay physically attractive to their partner.
Wanting to get your partner’s attention is a very important part of a healthy relationship. For a couple with great chemistry, it’s very important to stay desirable to one another.
Taking care of yourself and making yourself physically desirable — these things are necessary in a healthy relationship. More than anything else, it’s about wanting to please your partner.
As mentioned earlier, for couples with great chemistry, paying attention and making their partner happy is crucial.
They enjoy every minute spent together, and people can tell.
Sparks fly when they’re together, and everyone in the room can feel it. Couples with great chemistry definitely can’t hide that connection.
They don’t even have to be overly touchy to make it known that they’re in love. They don’t have to be joined at the hip at every event! When chemistry is genuine, it’s undeniable.
The best way to tell if a couple has chemistry? The people around them can stand witness and see exactly how interconnected they are.
There’s no easy way to define romantic chemistry, and perhaps no one will ever be able to capture its full depth. We can talk about hormones, pheromones, and neurotransmitters all day but these still won’t be sufficient to capture that magical connection between two people.
Chemistry in itself isn’t love yet. It’s definitely a key cornerstone, though! Without chemistry, it’s difficult to build true rapport. A connection without chemistry is a challenge to establish.
You can’t force it, you can’t fake it. Chemistry is not something you can induce into existing. If it were something you could manufacture, it wouldn’t be so magical.
More importantly, chemistry isn’t common. When you go out and meet new people, chemistry isn’t a given. Not everyone will jive with you from the get go. In fact, it’s very rare to find someone you’re immediately comfortable with right off the bat.
In fact, this is what makes chemistry so “magical”. It’s uncommon, there’s no way to force it into existence, and therefore it is a very unique phenomenon that stands out in the expanse of human experience.
Not all people with great chemistry together will end up in a romantic relationship. Some may find themselves together as friends for life — and what a beautiful friendship that would be. Platonic connections built on chemistry are powerful in their own way.
If you’re looking for love, though, chemistry is definitely one of the factors to watch out for. Great romantic relationships are built when there is chemistry between two people. So stop looking for that mythical soulmate, and seek romantic chemistry instead.
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